During my meditation time today, a thought came to my mind about how I need to accept some life experiences that are not pleasant. I looked up the word acceptance because I did not like the idea of accepting painful situations. I found that acceptance is close in meaning to the word acquiescence from the Latin acquiēscere. The definition is “to find rest in.” Accepting a painful situation does not mean that I like the situation or agree with the situation, but I unravel the situation enough to find rest. I struggled with this new information for a minute and then I felt led to think about how I worked through the process of accepting my physical pain.
When my pain first began, I would freeze up and not be able to deal with the experience. The pain would then make its way through the process and leave. After the pain left, I lived in fear of the next episode. I lived in this fear for months until I met my breaking point. Then, I took action. I read books. I saw chiropractors and acupuncturists. I changed my diet. I switched my exercise routine to Pilates and yoga. I detoxed. I took a lot of Magnesium among a multitude of other supplements. The point is that I faced my fear with action and as a result the fear diminished over time. I no longer fear the next episode and I know my body well enough to feel the warning signs and know the patterns. I also know what techniques work for me during the pain. I no longer fear the pain because I have many tools in my toolbelt to try and relieve the suffering.
The next level I faced was resistance. I would feel the pain coming on and resist its presence which made the pain level feel worse. I resisted talking about my experience. I resisted the idea that this just might be the ebb and flow of my life for right now. I resisted until I exhausted my power to will the pain away from my body. Then, I found meditation like Yoga Nidra for Pain. I found journaling. I found quiet and stillness. In the quiet, I heard the important words of saying “Welcome, old friend” when the pain made its way through my body. I welcomed the pain. I found rest in my pain. Acceptance.
So here is the process that I am thinking about….I am resisting situations. I have moved out of the fear but I am at the wall of resistance. If I successfully used stillness to move from resistance to acceptance with physical pain, could I use this process for emotional pain?
When I am consumed with fear, I need to move to action to remove the power of the fear.
Fear is gone, but resistance lingers.
To move from resistance to acceptance, I found stillness. Stillness lead to Acceptance.
To me this is very interesting and exciting!!!
Fear—-(action)—-Resistance—-(stillness)—-Acceptance
I would love to hear your stories! Share your experience of moving from Fear to Acceptance.
Amber Mattingly 